I was hired for my first “real-world” job this past August, and by “real world” I mean the glamourous life of a 9-5 job with an office and steady paycheck. While I’ve only worked here for 6 months, the excitement of getting my first post-graduate job and finally starting my career has slowly lost its sparkle.

I think like most of my peers, we have this perception that as soon as we get handed our diplomas we’re going to march off the stage and into our dream career. Our co-workers will become our best friends, our bosses will continually be impressed by our incredible talent and understanding at such a young age, and our paychecks will be enough to fund a semi-yearly trip to the Bahamas. No one else? Ok then, maybe that was just me.

But let’s be real. Like most things in life, good things take time. (Or so I’m told). Again, I’ve only been at this for a short time, but I’ve already learned immeasurably more about myself and the field that I’m working in than I thought possible. I’ve learned that I’m widely unprepared for most things about being an adult (more on 401Ks later…) and I still have so much to learn.

With that in mind, here are six things that I’ve been reminding myself during this season of life, and maybe they will encourage you to do the same, or at least offer yourself a little more grace as you start to navigate your own career path.

1. You have to Start Somewhere.

I feel really lucky that I’ve found a job that is in the field of work that I studied in college, and even luckier that I really enjoy what I studied and am surrounded with every day. But that doesn’t mean I don’t get frustrated re-arranging fabric samples twice a week or routinely checking off monotonous daily tasks. Regardless of how you spin it, an entry level position is just that: entry level.

I can at least take a little comfort in knowing that very few people stumble out of college and into their dream job, so I’m not the only one that feels like the low man on the totem pole. All I (and you) have to do is keep taking the next right step. I don’t know what that looks like in your life, but for me it’s taking this job as an opportunity to keep learning more about what I’m interested in, how I operate in a new position and what my strengths and weaknesses are.

2. Stop Comparing.

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” As humans seeing how we measure up to those around us is natural. I think we dismiss it as a way to check our success and monitor our failures. But that’s unhealthy for multiple reasons:

First, it fosters jealousy and competition. While a little competition can be healthy- spurring you to work harder and achieve new things, it can also hurt people and hinder positive relationships in our lives.

Second, it can nurture a feeling of self-doubt. Social media has begun to rule our lives, and it’s hard not to compare the unglamorous moments of your daily life to everyone else’s highlight reel. Remember, people don’t share pictures of them making photocopies or picking up dog shit. They capture the moment they got a big promotion, or completed a successful project.

So when you’re tempted to check up on how a peer’s new job is going, instead of scaling your success’ to theirs, try congratulating them and take some mental notes on what they did to achieve that success.

3. It’s not personal.

This is by far the hardest thing I’ve been learning. I have a good family friend that always talks about being responsible for things that are only inside of your hula-hoop. Completing a deadline on time? In your hula-hoop. How you treat your boss or co-worker? Your hula-hoop. How your boss reacts to an email you forward them? Not your hula-hoop.

I’ve been feeling responsible, even guilty at times, when things that are out of my control go wrong. I get nervous to relay bad news and anxious that somehow I messed up, but it’s important for me to remind myself in these moments that I did what I was asked to do, and that’s the best I can do. By all means, go above and beyond what’s asked or expected of you, but at some point you have to let go of the outcome. It’s not personal, it’s life.

4. Embrace the Journey.

Goals are great. They’re a great trajectory of what drives us through our daily lives, and reminds us of our passions. But the end goal should not be your everything. Natalie Stone for Darling Magazine writes

Oftentimes, our imagined destinations are a romanticized fairytale of what we hope could potentially exist in our futures. When the going gets rough, it can be easier to ignore the here-and-now and move forward in a falsified futuristic state of mind versus living in the tangible present.

Embracing the Journey gets back to the very root of how I want to live my life. I want to be surprised and delighted with the ordinary, and I’m learning how to translate that into my work life too. I want to take every opportunity, and learn from every failure so that someday when I do achieve my dreams and goals, I realize it was by living fully in the present and not skipping ahead to the next chapter.

5. Keep Learning.

I remember sitting in class when an industry professional gave a presentation on how they got to where they were today. There were many wonderful pieces of advice, and moments of inspiration, but the thing that stuck out the most to me was her response to the question: “Did you feel prepared for your career after you left college?” Her answer: “No.”

It’s not that she didn’t have wonderful teachers and great schooling, it’s that you can’t teach everything you need to know for the real world in a classroom. There are so many things that I’ve learned within the last few months that I never knew I needed to learn while in school, and that’s ok. Instead of being discouraged that I don’t have the answers or understanding, I’m focusing on being like a sponge- soaking up everything I can. Saying yes to new and challenging situations so that little by little I do feel prepared to take on whatever is thrown my way.

6. You are not your job.

Seriously, you are not your job. We often let what we do from 9-5 define who we are, but it’s something that you do, not who you are. You could be really great or frankly terrible at your job and it still would not relay the depth of who you are as a person. You are a friend, a dreamer, a daughter and a hard worker. You are passionate, friendly and clever. You are full of the stories that you’ve made, and the adventures you’ve been a part of.

While it’s great to be passionate about what you’re spending your time on, it’s not everything. I think to be a well-rounded person, it’s important to pursue people and interest outside of what we do for a living. It’s important to remember that there is so much to be offered from the world, and so much to say yes to. You are not your job, it’s just what you do.

 

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